Etty Hillesum

Discovering God

Sunday the 8th June: I think I'll do it anyway: I'll turn inward for half an hour each morning before work, and listen to my inner voice. Lose myself. You could also call it meditation. I am still a bit wary of that word. But anyway, why not? A quiet half-hour within yourself... But it's not so simple, that sort of 'quiet hour'. It has to be learned. A lot of unimportant inner litter and bits and pieces have to be swept out first. Even a small head can be piled high inside with irrelevant distractions. True, there may be edifying emotions and thoughts, too, but the clutter is ever present. So let this be the aim of meditation: to turn one's innermost being into a vast empty plain, with none of that treacherous undergrowth to impede the view. So that something of 'God' can enter you, and something of 'Love' too.

Refusing to Hate

... you must be able to bear your sorrow; even if it seems to crush you, you will be able to stand up again, for human beings are so strong, and your sorrow must become an integral part of yourself... you mustn't run away from it, but bear it like an adult. Do not relieve your feelings through hatred, do not seek to be avenged on all German mothers, for they too, sorrow for their slain and murdered sons. Give your sorrow all the space and shelter in yourself that is its due, for if everyone bears his grief honestly and courageously, the sorrow that now fills the world will abate. But if you do not clear a decent shelter for your sorrow, and instead reserve most of the space inside you for hatred and thoughts of revenge - from which new sorrows will be born for others - then sorrow will never cease in this world and will multiply.

A Woman for Our Time

She interrupts our scepticism about faith,
and she invites us to believe again.
She interrupts our narrow assumptions about religion itself,
and she invites us to pray.
She interrupts our easy hatred of our enemy,
and she invites us to see.
She interrupts our despair about the future,
and she invites us to be courageous.



From: Etty Hillesum, A Life Transformed by Patrick Woodhouse